Hi.
So, the podcast kinda went on hold because I was having difficulty booking guests during the WSOP. I was gonna try again afterward, but I went through a difficult couple of months there, both personally and professionally. I don’t want to get into too much detail especially about what is personal and involves other people, so I’ll just say I have a family member dealing with with addiction and things got pretty bad for a while there. Didn’t have a lot of opportunity to get back into the swing of things with poker in any facet – playing, writing, podcasting, streaming, commentary, etc. (To be honest, I don’t even know if I need the “etc.” I think I covered everything.)
I also was starting to doubt that this project would go anywhere, but that’s probably more indicative of my level of self-doubt and my dismay at the lack of instant success. I guess if I was better known (and/or a better marketer), I might have been immediately successful. But even getting famous guests is not the same thing as being famous yourself. And many streamers built up their audiences over time, I assume.
But part of that doubt also meant looking for work earnestly again. Alas, nothing has borne fruit; even the interview I did get to do exactly what I did at my last job went nowhere. It’s been long enough that I was probably a little rusty on my knowledge, but I have the experience and the references, so I don’t know what happened. That had me in a bit of dismay: If I can’t get a job doing the exact job I used to when I was last employed, what hope do I have of getting any job?
So while I am not closing the door on looking, I am now recommitting myself to poker. I’ve been adapting my schedule so I can play something more like full-time instead of “barely and hoping something works out.” Once I get settled into my routine, I plan to resume work on the podcast and perhaps start occasionally streaming as well.
And I’m doing all this while trying to stay off alcohol, as well. (I don’t have the same kind of addiction problems as my family member, but I am forty-five years old and simply do not have the mental energy to play my best and play as much as I need to if I drink.)
Money might be an issue. I’m working on that. I need a bigger bankroll if I’m gonna make a living, because I just gotta be able to play bigger tournaments. Might require backing, or borrowing, or something else. (Probably not crime, unless I think I can get away with it.) We’ll see how that shakes out.
The big thing is that I’m working to put in full-time hours again, and volume is king. Treat it like a job if you want to make a living at it. Don’t half-ass it and hope you get lucky and spike the big one. I have, fortunately, reignited my passion for the game in the last five years. A lot of why it didn’t work out in 2011 or 2016 is that I didn’t really want to be playing anymore. Now? I find myself enjoying it again and I can realistically do it well enough to make a living, if not necessarily to ever get rich. (Although when it comes to tournaments, all it takes in that regard is one big break.)
Here’s hoping it works out. Once upon a time, I merely didn’t like having a boss or a job. Now, it seems like I need to do this because it’s the only thing I can’t get fired from.